Before you speak, T.H.I.N.K.!

ThinkaboutitDear Readers,

Thank you all for the heartfelt wishes, prayers and good vibes you sent our way as we waited for our daughter’s test results from the endocrinologist.

For those who missed my update, all is normal, no chemical abnormalities exist so I guess I can stop worrying. HA! As if that is even possible. I am a parent, I believe it goes with the territory to worry about your child. But seriously, I am glad that there was such a strong reaction to my last post because as I read your comments, questions and viewpoints it helped me crystallize what I want to say even more.

I don’t think people mean to be mean about anything really, they just don’t THINK before they tweet, instagram, post on facebook or comment.

T    H      I    N     K                                      T    H      I    N     K                        T    H      I    N     K

Is it True? Perception is truth  – I think Gandhi said that – so this could get a little wooly, but I think it’s a worthwhile to ask yourself, is what I am about to say, True? or do I think it’s true but maybe it’s not ?

Is it Helpful? – Be careful with this one, sometimes “Help” masquerades as helpful but what it is really is bossy or controlling.

Is it Inspiring? Ouch. How often is what we say, not inspiring? Our words have so much power, we can lift or we push down, let’s be sure we are doing our best to lift others not bring them down.

Is it Necessary? To add to this, is it necessary that you say it or is it maybe what someone else should say if you will give some space for them to do it, instead of jumping in (I am very guilty of this one)  And I am working on it. I freely admit that I love to talk, and sometimes I will say something that isn’t necessary to fill silence. Silence can be good. Magical things happen in silence.

Lastly and I think most importantly-

Is it Kind? I don’t have to tell you gentle reader, we can all use just as much kindness as we can get our hands on in our current climate. For a long time, I have concerned myself with being nice, but a few months ago, a friend pointed out that nice is not what she aspired to be, but kind. I like that and continue to strive for that label.

I have posted recently about some fights my partner and I have been having. It’s normal, and we are working our way through it. I was trying to pinpoint a cause or an inciting incident of the frequency of our fights and I think that it all stems a sincere lack of kindness with each other.  Not mean, exactly, but not kind. I came to this conclusion recently so hopefully it is the answer, but what I am finding is that there is not just one answer but many and like life, you can’t look at the back of the book for the answers, you must figure it out as you go. Trying some things and watching them fail, and then trying again, hopefully this time figuring out where you went wrong and doing it better that tenth or eleventh time.

In the meantime, dear reader, I invite you to…

Think about it… and while you think about it, it’s not a bad idea to jump in on the 31 Days of Kindness my buddy Ryan Avery is doing and DO something yourself!   #31DaysofKindness (check it out)

Tomorrow is Day 9-

DAY 9 – Give/send someone a small, anonymous gift
Of course receiving gifts on birthdays and holidays are fun but even better is a random gift for no reason! You could look up someone’s ‘wishlist’ on Amazon and send them something. You could leave a coffee gift card on your coworkers desk. You could also buy a small something, leave it in a park with a note saying “For you!”

I think that is a pretty kind gesture so even if you just do tomorrow’s task, that would be better than nothing, right?

Think About it….

 

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