I have long had a healthy respect for plans, spending over 2 years planning for our wedding is just one in a long list of examples of my fondness for preparation.
I have to say nothing prepared me for the amount of plans that will go to absolute chaos from 0-90 like being a parent.
Case in point- Our family was planning to spend weekend with his grandparents and enjoy Christmas. Sounds great, right?
Well, it started out well, but quickly descended into chaos at about 9 o’clock Friday night.
Normally the little one’s bedtime. Now I have to confess, we are spoiled rotten with this, because typically we put her down and say good night and off she drifts to sleep.
There are exceptions which I have talked about on this blog, but in general we are lucky in this regard especially given all the struggles I have heard other parents talk about and I think this is something that is constantly in flux so at any minute she could decide that she is done with bedtime at 9 and decide to stay up till 4 a.m. which is precisely what happened on Friday night.
Tried and true tricks, things that have worked since she was born, all FAILED to soothe her to slumber. She was not upset, just awake and full of energy.
I will admit this sounds very calm and collected but that was not the picture. I was really frustrated that NOTHING I was doing was working. I was thinking to myself, “I am her mother, can I really not comfort her?” Not a happy place to be, and I actually started to feel myself getting really upset and then it hit me. This isn’t about me. IT IS ABOUT HER.
After I had that realization, I calmed down a lot and went back to troubleshooting the current issue.
No matter what we did, nothing would convince her to go to sleep until finally she just wore herself out. Relieved and more than a little exhausted, my husband and I passed out ourselves and woke up later and were in total agreement, we were going home so she could (hopefully) sleep in her own bed and try to get back to “normal”.
The grandparents were extremely understanding and recounted their own tales of sleepless nights.
I found it an excellent opportunity to embrace the lack of comfort that planning brought me in that moment of looking at her and realizing no way is she going to sleep.
So, I have two choices.
- I can gnash my teeth and be super pissed that she foiled my “plan” to follow a schedule.
- I can embrace the dance of life, the frustrating, the happy, hard, the easy, and go with it.
By the way, these pictures would not have been taken if our plans had not changed.
It’s an excellent metaphor for life, you don’t need a kid to embrace chaos, you just need other people who do not have a copy of your blueprint to deviate and challenge your plan.
What will you choose?
Think About It.