Today my husband and I celebrate our marriage which occurred on a very very very very very very HOT day in July. (my husband enjoys reminding me of this so I need to be sure to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.
I remember being excited about the wedding and happy that the people I loved most were in my wedding party or getting ready to meet me at the end of the aisle.
I wish I could say that I KNEW then that we would be here today, but you don’t KNOW that. You hope that, and you work towards that, AND I don’t think anyone gets married with the idea that “well, maybe it will work out, and maybe it won’t”
What I can say is that I KNEW we loved each other and I KNEW that we were both committed and spent the last 2 and half years planning (7 years married, 10 together) the wedding of my dreams and designing the marriage that WE wanted.
Something my darling husband says to me all the time, especially when we face difficulty (together) is “We will figure it out”. I love this because it reinforces the idea that there is a solvable problem on the table and that WE will figure it out. Not him, not me, but WE.
In looking back on the last seven years, I have definitely learned a lot about our relationship and each other and with this anniversary I have these takeaways to share.
- Sometimes it is a better idea to go to bed angry than to stay up arguing.
- Remember, you are on the same team, the second you start saying “Well, if he would just…” or “If only she would…” Nope. WE.
- You WILL have hard times, remember that you also have each other.
- If you are angry now, think before you speak. “will this matter in 2 hours? 2 days? 2 months? 2 years? (I struggle with this and it’s getting better all the time)
- Remember that you can “react” or “respond” to what your partner says. Responding is a lot more difficult and ultimately healthier for your relationship.
- Have fun, laugh and ENJOY your partner.
- Remember, “YES means YES”!!!!- don’t pretend something is acceptable to you if in reality it bothers you. For more on this, see the phenomenal Avery couple talking about the relationship game changer in their marriage https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kKyaGBJxCYo
Oh and being from Louisiana, this is the lagniappe ( it means you get it for free )
Be your partner’s biggest cheerleader!
Oh and one more thing- HAPPY ANNIVERSARY JEREMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!